The meaning of these mysterious runes in our home shall elude us no longer! Let's be as scientific about it as possible.

I'll kick the study off with the classic scientific practice of sitting for a few hours and staring as hard as I can at the object of study.

I'm gonna look for linguistic patterns, work out the morphology of the words and whether the etymological roots are recognisable

So maybe this was a bit reckless, but I went ahead and licked some of the runes. I'm sorry! I was very careful to lick as gently as possible.

And while this has contributed little to linguistic comprehension (and perhaps much to extra wooziness -- hard to tell), I'm now pretty sure I'm seeing things I couldn't see before: 

A hole NE of here?  A doghouse under construction to the west? A ghostly and faintly flickering research lab due south of here, and an even more ghostly (and even more faintly flickering ) waterlogged home directly on top of (and inside of?) our nice tunnel home? Yikes!

I think I'd better lie down for the rest of the day, but I'm taking a notebook with me, and I'll yell out if I have any etymological insights.

Well, short any particular intuition on how the runes might be deciphered, I'll take the most useful step I can think of. I've transcribed all the symbols I can make out, diagrammed carefully their location on the wall, and attempted even to account for the distribution of the oozing. Hopefully these notes will be of use to someone more clever than I.

Whoa, dude! Did someone just have a psychedelic experience from licking some runes? I wanna lick some runes, too!

*Licks runes*

I don't feel any different. You sure this is supposed to work? Maybe I should try having some more.

*Lick* *lick* *lick* *lick* *lick* *lick* *lick*

...

Yeah, still nothing. I don't - uggggggggghhh!

...

i saw too many things, now my head hurts

I decided to wipe the runes clean with a moist towelette and now they're glowing.

I walk down the tunnel towards the rune room. The walls are slick with slime, some of it old slime other parts fresh. I wade through the writhing mass of psychedelic tunnel tasters who have licked too much and can no longer stand. I see the etchings and hear their unworldly hum. The hum drowns out the moans and cries of the rune junkies around me. I find a notebook at the base of the wall: Justin's notes. The hum intensifies. The book contains detailed drawings of all the runes. I turn the book upside down, a cipher so obvious none before me thought to try. There in plain language it says simply "WARNING DO NOT LICK THE WALLS".

The now-glowing rules have been studied and solved, cautioning future visitors:

"WARNING: DO NOT LICK THE WALLS". Mystery solved.

The moist towelette hums with purpose.