Your one-stop shop for the story of the game
It kind of is. My idea (In my original draft of the story) was that even though there is evidence for it being the boss, there might be another reason for the change of employment. Now even though the robot route is my favorite we could (probably shouldn't though) fall in to the "Horror Game" pit-trap and make it about demons. ;)
so I think Jesse should have a day shift where you talk to the NPCs and a night shift where he investigates his new coworkers (since they're robots they don't log off work), but they don't like that which is why the are the enemies for the horror experience. And I know this will sound cliche but I think we need a collectible. I've had some ideas like external hard drives or USB drives or something, and my idea is that you can read other employees emails during the night shift, if you can guess the password (which could be a collectible or secret).
Here is the first part of my experimental script copied straight from my document, please tell me anything needs changing or reworking:
Replaced
Jesse is on the bus to work, there are people all around him, he is drowned in a sea of voices. After a short bus ride the vehicle comes to a stop at the GGS (gravity games studios) HQ, Jesse steps out of the bus and heads towards the door, he looks up at the familiar skyscraper that is GGS HQ. When Jesse opens the door he is immediately hit by the familiar sound of computer typing, phone calls and people speaking louder than necessary. The receptionist is almost hidden behind mountains of paperwork as Jesse passes her and walks into ‘office sector one’. He goes to his usual desk, desk nr. 87 where he turns on his computer and cracks his knuckles for another day of hard work. He looks around, everything is as usual, the large room with an infinite sea of office cubicles, but wait, one of his colleagues, the one named Mark, is gone, and in his place is a robot. Jesse had heard the CEO talk about replacing workers with machines, but he had never imagined that it would actually happen, but beside him now, was a human-shaped robot, with its lifeless eyes fixed on the monitor and its metall fingers typing systematically on the keyboard. Jesse raised an eyebrow at the unannounced replacement of Mark, where was Mark now? Did he get a new job? Jesse tries to work but is constantly interrupted by his own thoughts of what has happened to Mark. He comes to the conclusion that he should maybe ask the receptionist, maybe if he gets an answer he won’t think so much about it. So he gets up from his desk, passes the lifeless automaton and walks out of the sector and towards the white desk of the receptionist who is still hidden behind Mount paperwork. Jesse knocks on the desk clearing his throat, he can barely hear the muffled voice of the receptionist behind all the papers, the receptionist pushes aside a stack of papers looking Jesse in the eyes “yes?” she says in a hurried manner “um, do you seem to know what happened to an employee named Mark?” the receptionist looked at him “which Mark? Mark Johnson, Mark Robins or Mark Halfor?” Jesse scratches his chin “Halfor I think” the receptionist nods and types something on her computer “according to the files the boss has provided, he is still working here, and is already at work by now” Jesse raises an eyebrow “but th-” but he’s interrupted by the receptionist “if you are so keen on knowing, go ask the boss yourself”. Jesse walks over to the elevator and calls it down to him, when it arrives he enters it and clicks the highest button appropriately named ‘boss’. When the lift reaches the very top floor of the building Jesse is immediately met with a fancy hallway leading to a hand carved oak door with a golden handle. The CEO’s office is a circular room with windows pointing out to all directions, in the luxurious chair behind the oak desk sits Mathias Crawson, the CEO of GGS “do we have an appointment?” he asks without getting out of the chair, Jesse closes the door behind him “I just want to know what happened to a fellow employee named Mark, Mark Halfor I mean” the CEO gets up from his chair and turns to look out the window “I don’t understand the question” Jesse clears his throat “Mark has been… Replaced” the CEO shakes his head “no new people have been hired, now get back to work or I’ll cut your salary” Jesse slowly walks backwards, but now with a suspicion sparked inside him.
I've written more in the story! Here is the current product:
Replaced
Jesse is on the bus to work, there are people all around him, he is drowned in a sea of voices. After a short bus ride the vehicle comes to a stop at the GGS (gravity games studios) HQ, Jesse steps out of the bus and heads towards the door, he looks up at the familiar skyscraper that is GGS HQ. When Jesse opens the door he is immediately hit by the familiar sound of computer typing, phone calls and people speaking louder than necessary. The receptionist is almost hidden behind mountains of paperwork as Jesse passes her and walks into ‘office sector one’. He goes to his usual desk, desk nr. 87 where he turns on his computer and cracks his knuckles for another day of hard work. He looks around, everything is as usual, the large room with an infinite sea of office cubicles, but wait, one of his colleagues, the one named Mark, is gone, and in his place is a robot. Jesse had heard the CEO talk about replacing workers with machines, but he had never imagined that it would actually happen, but beside him now, was a human-shaped robot, with its lifeless eyes fixed on the monitor and its metall fingers typing systematically on the keyboard. Jesse raised an eyebrow at the unannounced replacement of Mark, where was Mark now? Did he get a new job? Jesse tries to work but is constantly interrupted by his own thoughts of what has happened to Mark. He comes to the conclusion that he should maybe ask the receptionist, maybe if he gets an answer he won’t think so much about it. So he gets up from his desk, passes the lifeless automaton and walks out of the sector and towards the white desk of the receptionist who is still hidden behind Mount paperwork. Jesse knocks on the desk clearing his throat, he can barely hear the muffled voice of the receptionist behind all the papers, the receptionist pushes aside a stack of papers looking Jesse in the eyes “yes?” she says in a hurried manner “um, do you seem to know what happened to an employee named Mark?” the receptionist looked at him “which Mark? Mark Johnson, Mark Robins or Mark Halfor?” Jesse scratches his chin “Halfor I think” the receptionist nods and types something on her computer “according to the files the boss has provided, he is still working here, and is already at work by now” Jesse raises an eyebrow “but th-” but he’s interrupted by the receptionist “if you are so keen on knowing, go ask the boss yourself”. Jesse walks over to the elevator and calls it down to him, when it arrives he enters it and clicks the highest button appropriately named ‘boss’. When the lift reaches the very top floor of the building Jesse is immediately met with a fancy hallway leading to a hand carved oak door with a golden handle. The CEO’s office is a circular room with windows pointing out to all directions, in the luxurious chair behind the oak desk sits Mathias Crawson, the CEO of GGS “do we have an appointment?” he asks without getting out of the chair, Jesse closes the door behind him “I just want to know what happened to a fellow employee named Mark, Mark Halfor I mean” the CEO gets up from his chair and turns to look out the window “I don’t understand the question” Jesse clears his throat “Mark has been… Replaced” the CEO shakes his head “no new people have been hired, now get back to work or I’ll cut your salary” Jesse slowly walks backwards, but now with a suspicion sparked inside him. Jesse walks down the hallway back to the elevator, his head spinning, what was going on? Jesse walks into the elevator pressing the button to the first floor, and after a short trip down, he once again stands by the reception. He walks into the office area making sure to have at least a meter between him and the automaton, before he once again sits in his uncomfortable office chair and starts typing on the keyboard.
*Screen fades to black
A few hours later the lunch break starts, Jesse gets up from his chair, noting that the machine beside him hasn’t stopped typing. When he reaches the cantine he walks over the the far end of the lunch line, taking in all the people in the cantine, the room has ten long gray tables and the occasional trash can, at the front of the room is a long disk where employees are served their lunch. Jesse stands in the line for a while before finally he is at the front with a steel plate in his hands. The lunch ladies are about as merry as a janitor who’s lost his job, they are always in this mood for some reason, one them picks up a ladle and drops a huge portion of what seems to be old mashed potatoes “sauce?” she says in a grainy voice, Jesse nods “uh, yes” she rolls her eyes pouring some darb brown sauce onto his plate “t- thank you”. Jesse walks over to his usual table and sits down, damn, he forgot his fork, he gets up from the table and walks back over to the disk to get his fork, when he reaches the cutlery stand he notices a small black leather puch on the table, he looks around him, before quickly grabbing the fork, and the puch. When he is back at his table Jesse puts down the fork and opens the pouch, inside it are a few paper dollars, but also a small note, he takes out the white paper and reads it ‘475634’, he raises an eyebrow, but reads under the numbers, it reads ‘code to encrypted email’, Jesse shrugs and stuffs the note into his pocket before devouring his lunch. When lunch break is over employees usually get half an hour break, so Jesse walks over to the large albeit old employee lounge, sitting down on the gray couch, there were rumours around the office that this couch had once been brown, but it was so old all the colour had worn off. Around ten minutes later another colleague of Jesse’s arrived into the lounge hurling himself onto the couch, this was Jack, a close friend of Jesse’s who had recently started working at the company “hey” Jesse said awkwardly, Jacklooks at him “um, rumours fare you have been going crazy, the receptionist told me you asked what was wrong with Mark” Jesse stares at him “wait, you haven’t noticed?” Jack raises and eyebrow “what? Is there something I should notice?” Jesse leans back “Mark, is… Well… He has been replaced” Jack chuckles “funny” Jesse frowns “oh come on! He has been replaced with a robot or something!” Jack stares at him “you are joking right?” Jesse gets up from the couch “our break is over” he says in an annoyed voice before walking out into the office area.
Avast! I don't have that much new story to present this week, because as I have mentioned before, I have had to sort out some passport stuff this week, but I managed to squeeze in some little time, so it may not be much, but it's honest work ;).
Replaced
Jesse is on the bus to work, there are people all around him, he is drowned in a sea of voices. After a short bus ride the vehicle comes to a stop at the GGS (gravity games studios) HQ, Jesse steps out of the bus and heads towards the door, he looks up at the familiar skyscraper that is GGS HQ. When Jesse opens the door he is immediately hit by the familiar sound of computer typing, phone calls and people speaking louder than necessary. The receptionist is almost hidden behind mountains of paperwork as Jesse passes her and walks into ‘office sector one’. He goes to his usual desk, desk nr. 87 where he turns on his computer and cracks his knuckles for another day of hard work. He looks around, everything is as usual, the large room with an infinite sea of office cubicles, but wait, one of his colleagues, the one named Mark, is gone, and in his place is a robot. Jesse had heard the CEO talk about replacing workers with machines, but he had never imagined that it would actually happen, but beside him now, was a human-shaped robot, with its lifeless eyes fixed on the monitor and its metall fingers typing systematically on the keyboard. Jesse raised an eyebrow at the unannounced replacement of Mark, where was Mark now? Did he get a new job? Jesse tries to work but is constantly interrupted by his own thoughts of what has happened to Mark. He comes to the conclusion that he should maybe ask the receptionist, maybe if he gets an answer he won’t think so much about it. So he gets up from his desk, passes the lifeless automaton and walks out of the sector and towards the white desk of the receptionist who is still hidden behind Mount paperwork. Jesse knocks on the desk clearing his throat, he can barely hear the muffled voice of the receptionist behind all the papers, the receptionist pushes aside a stack of papers looking Jesse in the eyes “yes?” she says in a hurried manner “um, do you seem to know what happened to an employee named Mark?” the receptionist looked at him “which Mark? Mark Johnson, Mark Robins or Mark Halfor?” Jesse scratches his chin “Halfor I think” the receptionist nods and types something on her computer “according to the files the boss has provided, he is still working here, and is already at work by now” Jesse raises an eyebrow “but th-'' but he’s interrupted by the receptionist “if you are so keen on knowing, go ask the boss yourself”. Jesse walks over to the elevator and calls it down to him, when it arrives he enters it and clicks the highest button appropriately named ‘boss’. When the lift reaches the very top floor of the building Jesse is immediately met with a fancy hallway leading to a hand carved oak door with a golden handle. The CEO’s office is a circular room with windows pointing out to all directions, in the luxurious chair behind the oak desk sits Mathias Crawson, the CEO of GGS “do we have an appointment?” he asks without getting out of the chair, Jesse closes the door behind him “I just want to know what happened to a fellow employee named Mark, Mark Halfor I mean” the CEO gets up from his chair and turns to look out the window “I don’t understand the question” Jesse clears his throat “Mark has been… Replaced” the CEO shakes his head “no new people have been hired, now get back to work or I’ll cut your salary” Jesse slowly walks backwards, but now with a suspicion sparked inside him. Jesse walks down the hallway back to the elevator, his head spinning, what was going on? Jesse walks into the elevator pressing the button to the first floor, and after a short trip down, he once again stands by the reception. He walks into the office area making sure to have at least a meter between him and the automaton, before he once again sits in his uncomfortable office chair and starts typing on the keyboard.
*Screen fades to black
A few hours later the lunch break starts, Jesse gets up from his chair, noting that the machine beside him hasn’t stopped typing. When he reaches the cantine he walks over to the far end of the lunch line, taking in all the people in the cantine. The room has ten long gray tables and the occasional trash can, at the front of the room is a long disk where employees are served their lunch. Jesse stands in the line for a while before finally he is at the front with a steel plate in his hands. The lunch ladies are about as merry as a janitor who’s lost his job, they are always in this mood for some reason, one them picks up a ladle and drops a huge portion of what seems to be old mashed potatoes “sauce?” she says in a grainy voice, Jesse nods “uh, yes” she rolls her eyes pouring some darb brown sauce onto his plate “t- thank you”. Jesse walks over to his usual table and sits down, damn, he forgot his fork, he gets up from the table and walks back over to the disk to get his fork, when he reaches the cutlery stand he notices a small black leather pouch on the table, he looks around him, before quickly grabbing the fork, and the pooch. When he is back at his table Jesse puts down the fork and opens the pouch, inside it are a few paper dollars, but also a small note, he takes out the white paper and reads it ‘475634’, he raises an eyebrow, but reads under the numbers, it reads ‘code to encrypted email’, Jesse shrugs and stuffs the note into his pocket before devouring his lunch. When lunch break is over employees usually get a half an hour break, so Jesse walks over to the large albeit old employee lounge and hurls himself down on the gray couch, there were rumors around the office that this couch had once been brown, but it was so old all the color had worn off. Around ten minutes later another colleague of Jesse’s arrived into the lounge hurling himself onto the couch, this was Jack, a close friend of Jesse’s who had recently started working at the company “hey” Jesse said awkwardly, Jacklooks at him “um, rumors fare you have been going crazy, the receptionist told me you asked what was wrong with Mark” Jesse stares at him “wait, you haven’t noticed?” Jack raises an eyebrow “what? Is there something I should notice?” Jesse leans back “Mark, is… Well… He has been replaced” Jack chuckles “funny” Jesse frowns “oh come on! He has been replaced with a robot or something!” Jack stares at him “you are joking right?” Jesse gets up from the couch “our break is over” he says in an annoyed voice before walking out into the office area.
*Flashback sequence*
Ten years earlier: Jesse remembers driving his car, he sits behind the wheel listening to the radio, the news reporter is talking about a scientific breakthrough “scientists have recently made a breakthrough in the neurogenetics field, this new specimen takes the form of a vaccine…” But Jesse hears not the rest, as in front of him a large truck is about to turn the corner, he slows down waiting for the truck to proceed, but seeing as though the large vehicle isn’t proceeding, he drives forward himself. He remembers glass piercing his skin, the truck toppling over down onto him, and the car getting crushed under the weight of the superior vehicle, all with him in it. Next thing he knows, he hears beeping from what sounds like a device, he wakes his eyes to see he is lying in a hospital bed, there are several wires connected into his body, and over him several medical personnel are discussing something, he hears only the words “surgery…” and “critical…” then he again loses his senses. He once again wakes up, his vision and hearing capabilities obscured slightly, he can feel that he is moving, like on a tray, or a hospital bed, there are four surges around him rolling the bed through the hospital hallways, they seem exceedingly concerned, he once again manages do grasp some words “experimental…”, “not tested…” and “not time…”.
*present day*
Jesse once again sits at his desk typing mindlessly at the keyboard, the disturbing machine still beside him, he keeps typing for a short while before his office phone rings, he rolls his eyes and picks up the monochrome stationary phone “hello? This is Jesse from the development department” he hears the person on the other side clearing his throat “yes, this is me, your upper manager” Jesse raises an eyebrow “ok? What are you calling for?” the CEO once again clears his throat “I have noticed your severe lack of progress” Jesse nodded for himself “oh, yes, I am sorry, I- uh” he could hear the CEO scoff “no need to apologize, you will just have to work farther into the night” Jesse stuttered a bit before replying “b- but, I’ve places to be!” the boss coughed “and you’ve work to do, now stop wasting your time and start typing”. Jesse was in a bad mood the rest of the day, he had plans for the night, and now he had to waste all his time on some stupid game? He watched as his colleagues left the office all jolly and merry, all while he sat there typing braindeadlessly on his keyboard. Everyone had left and night had set when Jesse decided to go to the toilet, he passed the robot which was still active and working, he then passed all the empty desks before arriving at the back of the office hall. There were three doors, one for the male bathroom, one for the female bathroom, and at the end of the room one marked ‘authorized personnel only’ the latter was half open, and led into a dark metal staircase spiraling down into a basement area. Jesse sat there for a minute, his eyes flashing between the bathroom door, and the much more appealing restricted door, a grin spread across his face, he looked around him making sure there wasn’t anyone else here, and when confirming the lonely situation, he took a deep breath and fully pushed open the white-ish door.
I love this! A couple of things
I just wanted to tell you this stuff because I didn't want you to create a script, and then I tell you, and it ruins your ideas (sorry if I already did that). And I need your thoughts on the stuff above: tell me if you have better ideas. In small replies if you need. You're doing great!
PS: You can take a break, btw, if you want. Though I'll still need your thoughts every now and again. Sorry for the long message but I've been thinking about this for a while. Thanks!
I take that as a yes: The metal of the automatons is imbued with a chemical that changes their appearance to the blatant eye, Jesse however, has had a brain surgery, and so his brain manages to interpret the object for what it really is. Or atleast thats how simply I can explain it, read future updates on the story for the tiny details ;)
Here is a scientific way to explain the chemical if you need it: The chemical reflects light in such a way that it blurs the image, your brain sees the blurry image and puts the pieces together into what your brain thinks it is. This happens in real life when your in the dark and mistake something as for a person or creature.
And I need your opinion on my other ideas, especially on my idea that other people (Like one or two, not nearly all of them) can see the robots. Thank you!
Thank you! I was worried that you didn't like the idea. So who is the antagonist? The CEO? Cause I was thinking there is no true antagonist. Or not an obvious one anyway, like a mystery. Either way I think the CEO should be able to see them. And a female I've named Vicki. But as I've said before your the writer so you make the decisions.
PS: Could I be co-writer? :3
I don't know if it helps but when I was making the main theme, the first thing that sounds in the brass is meant to be the studio itself as a big ominous "threat" or force of evil.
At least that's how I interpreted the story at that point ( on a side note, with the new things that are being added in the story I will probably make some tweaks of my own that help reflect the story better)
Well I have some ideas for secondary characters, but I don't know if they'll mesh with the existing story very well.
But Here is my versions of the characters:
Vikki: A very strong willed woman who won't back down in a fight/argument.
CEO: a ruthless business man who buys independent game devs who make all-the-sudden-popular video games.
Jesse: A natural multitask-er that is both the buildings soul computer technician and a programmer who specializes in the math and technical side.
John: a young intern whose only job is to run the coffee machine, keep the printers running and not distract the employees.
I like the descriptions except Jesse's
I must say, and this is really important, I'm not sure that Jesse should have any mental disability, specially DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder, also known as Multiple Personality Disorder). It's a pretty complex disorder that already has a lot of stigma behind it so I worry about having that as a characteristic for the protagonist. Specially if the game is very lore based, it might cause a lot of trouble. DID community is pretty tired of being used in fiction stuff as a way to make the plot "interesting", if that makes sense.
Just putting it out there so all the writers know
I will work with what I have so far for the other characters. Hopefully I'll have stuff soon
I also hate the stereotypes in fiction. And I didn't mean DID. I couldn't (and still can't) remember what it's called but like you find it hard to tell the truth. Like mentally. To keep you guessing about this character. I guess I should have googled it. I just thought it was simply enough that we could do in accurately. Sorry!
Here's a new one for Jesse: Jesse is a strong willed man that even though he doesn't talk much, he's always thinking. None of his coworkers know very much about him except Jack who entered the company with Jesse.
And here's Jack. I forgot about him: Jack is the clown. An extremely outgoing man He'll strike a conversation with anyone he thinks ins interesting, which is how he became Jesse's friend. Aside from that he has a mind for story which is how he got hired as a writer and eventually head writer at the company.
So there it is. Any side characters can be chopped up to a personality type like the secretary or a janitor. I think your right about the whole mental disorder thing. but I did want the CEO and Vikki to see the robots which means they need a mental or visual impairment. My idea was Vikki gets replaced and the CEO shuts himself in his office in fear of the robots.
I really like the new descriptions and I think that Jack as a character works pretty well! No need to say sorry btw lol, I just really care about mental health and things like that so sorry if I sounded rude when I made the comment.
With all this I can keep polishing all the things I have before showing them, Thanks!
Here's the first update in a while, note that I have removed the flashback sequence because of feedback, there's some juicy lore in this part:
Replaced
Jesse is on the bus to work, there are people all around him, he is drowned in a sea of voices. After a short bus ride the vehicle comes to a stop at the GGS (gravity games studios) HQ, Jesse steps out of the bus and heads towards the door, he looks up at the familiar skyscraper that is GGS HQ. When Jesse opens the door he is immediately hit by the familiar sound of computer typing, phone calls and people speaking louder than necessary. The receptionist is almost hidden behind mountains of paperwork as Jesse passes her and walks into ‘office sector one’. He goes to his usual desk, desk nr. 87 where he turns on his computer and cracks his knuckles for another day of hard work. He looks around, everything is as usual, the large room with an infinite sea of office cubicles, but wait, one of his colleagues, the one named Mark, is gone, and in his place is a robot. Jesse had heard the CEO talk about replacing workers with machines, but he had never imagined that it would actually happen, but beside him now, was a human-shaped robot, with its lifeless eyes fixed on the monitor and its metall fingers typing systematically on the keyboard. Jesse raised an eyebrow at the unannounced replacement of Mark, where was Mark now? Did he get a new job? Jesse tries to work but is constantly interrupted by his own thoughts of what has happened to Mark. He comes to the conclusion that he should maybe ask the receptionist, maybe if he gets an answer he won’t think so much about it. So he gets up from his desk, passes the lifeless automaton and walks out of the sector and towards the white desk of the receptionist who is still hidden behind Mount paperwork. Jesse knocks on the desk clearing his throat, he can barely hear the muffled voice of the receptionist behind all the papers, the receptionist pushes aside a stack of papers looking Jesse in the eyes “yes?” she says in a hurried manner “um, do you seem to know what happened to an employee named Mark?” the receptionist looked at him “which Mark? Mark Johnson, Mark Robins or Mark Halfor?” Jesse scratches his chin “Halfor I think” the receptionist nods and types something on her computer “according to the files the boss has provided, he is still working here, and is already at work by now” Jesse raises an eyebrow “but th-'' but he’s interrupted by the receptionist “if you are so keen on knowing, go ask the boss yourself”. Jesse walks over to the elevator and calls it down to him, when it arrives he enters it and clicks the highest button appropriately named ‘boss’. When the lift reaches the very top floor of the building Jesse is immediately met with a fancy hallway leading to a hand carved oak door with a golden handle. The CEO’s office is a circular room with windows pointing out to all directions, in the luxurious chair behind the oak desk sits Mathias Crawson, the CEO of GGS “do we have an appointment?” he asks without getting out of the chair, Jesse closes the door behind him “I just want to know what happened to a fellow employee named Mark, Mark Halfor I mean” the CEO gets up from his chair and turns to look out the window “I don’t understand the question” Jesse clears his throat “Mark has been… Replaced” the CEO shakes his head “no new people have been hired, now get back to work or I’ll cut your salary” Jesse slowly walks backwards, but now with a suspicion sparked inside him. Jesse walks down the hallway back to the elevator, his head spinning, what was going on? Jesse walks into the elevator pressing the button to the first floor, and after a short trip down, he once again stands by the reception. He walks into the office area making sure to have at least a meter between him and the automaton, before he once again sits in his uncomfortable office chair and starts typing on the keyboard.
*Screen fades to black
A few hours later the lunch break starts, Jesse gets up from his chair, noting that the machine beside him hasn’t stopped typing. When he reaches the cantine he walks over to the far end of the lunch line, taking in all the people in the cantine. The room has ten long gray tables and the occasional trash can, at the front of the room is a long disk where employees are served their lunch. Jesse stands in the line for a while before finally he is at the front with a steel plate in his hands. The lunch ladies are about as merry as a janitor who’s lost his job. They are always in this mood for some reason, one of them picks up a ladle and drops a huge portion of what seems to be old mashed potatoes “sauce?” she says in a grainy voice, Jesse nods “uh, yes” she rolls her eyes pouring some darb brown sauce onto his plate “t- thank you”. Jesse walks over to his usual table and sits down, damn, he forgot his fork, he gets up from the table and walks back over to the disk to get his fork, when he reaches the cutlery stand he notices a small black leather pouch on the table, he looks around him, before quickly grabbing the fork, and the pooch. When he is back at his table Jesse puts down the fork and opens the pouch, inside it are a few paper dollars, but also a small note, he takes out the white paper and reads it ‘475634’, he raises an eyebrow, but reads under the numbers, it reads ‘code to encrypted email’, Jesse shrugs and stuffs the note into his pocket before devouring his lunch. When lunch break is over employees usually get a half an hour break, so Jesse walks over to the large albeit old employee lounge and hurls himself down on the gray couch, there were rumors around the office that this couch had once been brown, but it was so old all the color had worn off. Around ten minutes later another colleague of Jesse’s arrived into the lounge hurling himself onto the couch, this was Jack, a close friend of Jesse’s who had recently started working at the company “hey” Jesse said awkwardly, Jacklooks at him “um, rumors fare you have been going crazy, the receptionist told me you asked what was wrong with Mark” Jesse stares at him “wait, you haven’t noticed?” Jack raises an eyebrow “what? Is there something I should notice?” Jesse leans back “Mark, is… Well… He has been replaced” Jack chuckles “funny” Jesse frowns “oh come on! He has been replaced with a robot or something!” Jack stares at him “you are joking right?” Jesse gets up from the couch “our break is over” he says in an annoyed voice before walking out into the office area.
Jesse once again sits at his desk typing mindlessly at the keyboard, the disturbing machine still beside him, he keeps typing for a short while before his office phone rings, he rolls his eyes and picks up the monochrome stationary phone “hello? This is Jesse from the development department” he hears the person on the other side clearing his throat “yes, this is me, your upper manager” Jesse raises an eyebrow “ok? What are you calling for?” the CEO once again clears his throat “I have noticed your severe lack of progress” Jesse nodded for himself “oh, yes, I am sorry, I- uh” he could hear the CEO scoff “no need to apologize, you will just have to work farther into the night” Jesse stuttered a bit before replying “b- but, I’ve places to be!” the boss coughed “and you’ve work to do, now stop wasting your time and start typing”. Jesse was in a bad mood the rest of the day, he had plans for the night, and now he had to waste all his time on some stupid game? He watched as his colleagues left the office all jolly and merry, all while he sat there typing braindeadlessly on his keyboard. Everyone had left and night had set when Jesse decided to go to the toilet, he passed the robot which was still active and working, he then passed all the empty desks before arriving at the back of the office hall. There were three doors, one for the male bathroom, one for the female bathroom, and at the end of the room one marked ‘authorized personnel only’ the latter was half open, and led into a dark metal staircase spiraling down into a basement area. Jesse sat there for a minute, his eyes flashing between the bathroom door, and the much more appealing restricted door, a grin spread across his face, he looked around him making sure there wasn’t anyone else here, and when confirming the lonely situation, he took a deep breath and fully pushed open the white-ish door. Behind it was a dark metal staircase leading down a story or two, a constant ventilator was running down there, as Jesse could hear a rusty hum at all times while standing in front of the door, but he slowly walked down taking in his surroundings as he slowly crept down the metal stairs, the walls were made of a rugged metal material, the stairs were made of what seemed like normal steel, but there was no way of being sure. He soon arrived at the bottom of the stairwell, in front of him was a white plastic door, it contained a small glass window on it, but the glass was so dirty it was hardly possible to make out anything, but Jesse slowly put his finger on the door and carefully pushed it open. The first thing that hit him was the smell of medicine, the second one was the door which hit him in the nose seeing as though the large rectangular piece of plastic was retracting back into its main position, but he pushed it open once again, this time making sure to enter while it was still open. Jesse stared in awe at the room, it was not extremely large, barely any larger than the employee lounge, that pesky man of a CEO wouldn’t invest anything in his employees, or so it seemed, but this small room contained several pieces of expensive equipment, weirdly enough lab equipment, it all seemed to be neurogenetics equipment, it looked like this was where they were researching the psychological side of the video games. Jesse walked around in the room for a bit examining all the peculiar lab equipment, and he who thought the night would be boring, one of the machines caught his attention more than the others though, it looked like a gray server cabinet, but it seemed only to contain hundreds upon hundreds of small chips all plugged into a large square disk, Jesse put his hand on the strange machine, and upon closer inspection the chips revealed something, each of them had two or three letters written onto their backs, some of the combinations included: ‘J.F.H’ ‘D.O’ and ‘M.D’ Jesse examined them all, the letters didn’t seem to stand for anything in particular, he put them back into the device and turned toward a large filing cabinet in the far end of the room, he slowly pulled one of the drawers open. He didn’t know what he had expected, the only thing inside the cabinet was a bunch of papers, but what papers were these? There were several hospital bills, all marked with names: ‘Jonathan Fredrick Hanses’ ‘Donald Oliver’, all the names were written in the top left of their respective hospital bills, all the incidents listed were quote on quote ‘normal’ accidents, car crashes, broken legs, but one stood out to Jesse, the one marked: Brain failure, it was assigned to a woman by the name of ‘Julia Violet’, he kept reading down the page examining the details, her address was written near the bottom of the page, he packed together the paper and stuffed it into his pocket. The silence was a few moments later broken up by an argument. There was a door in the right side of the room, it was simply marked ‘conference room’. Jesse could hear an argument emitting from inside, there were two men discussing something “sir, there is nothing we can do about it! We did what you asked us to do, it must be them that is the problem!” The first person sounded like a male in their thirties, he had a strong Glasgow accent, the second voice however he knew all too well, for it was the voice of the CEO “Mr. Joyhill, I paid you to do a job, so do it well” Joyhill sighed “I already told you sir, there is literally nothing doable about it, the easiest thing to do is to fire them” the CEO slammed his fist into a table “listen, if that chemical of yours doesn’t do its job, then force it to do it, all assets can be bent and warped till they obey, that is what I did with that imbecile Halford”. There was some more muttering behind the door before Joyhill scoffed “you give us little resources, yet you expect immense results, that’s not how science works” the CEO took a sip of something before clapping his hands together “dammit, Mr. Joyhill, I’ve better things to do, get the hell out of here” Joyhill grunted “so be it! We’ll see how you do without my science” the CEO laughed “you think we depend on you? We are the ones that construct the machines, we acquire the subjects, we do the extraction, you just do the theoretical calculations, and yet you dare say we need you, get out”.
I was thinking to add to the ascetic: we have the robot do NOTHING for the first two or three days then it disappears. After that the player knows something is off and then it jump scars them somehow. Also I think it should act independently from the CEO. Like it's built to be efficient and so it wants you out of the picture. But the CEO doesn't want it to kill Jesse.
Now the CEO being the villain seems too on the nose. But you pulled it off relatively well. I just wanted to say that why the CEO is doing it, should remain a mystery for the dedicated players to solve. Here are some cool ideas:
Sorry I've been very unexpectedly busy the last couple of days. But I've finished the Beta. Just putting some final fluff into it. After I send it to you guys I'm not going to send very many Demos/Betas because it slow me down a bit. Thank you for your patients.