What a wonderful little story you've told here, and was weirdly resonate with me. I'm a big proponent of not taking anyone or anything for granted, even though I often tell myself stuff that makes my days a lot worse. I'm constantly annoyed by my coworkers and cashiers, and I find myself feeling differently when "staffing shortages" impede my normal life. Very profound message that hit me. 

The writing in general was also really well done and was enjoyable from beginning to end. There were some good setups and payoffs. The main character's arc was well realized. I was genuinely intrigued to see what was going to happen.

The 2D art, while there isn't much of it, is very striking to look at. I'm a sucker for pencil drawings to begin with, and the minimalist, sketchy contrasting with the high-res speech bubble was a great choice. I only wish there were more "scenes."

My only complaint -- and this is minor -- is that there's not much "game" here. I know it's a visual novel and story comes first and foremost, but the only interaction can be done within the opening seconds of the game, and there it's nothing but advancing text, to the point where I felt like I was reading a short story that wouldn't advance until I click a button. I appreciated getting the protagonist's view on certain objects in his room -- it added to his character -- and I would've liked to explore the other areas in the same way. Perhaps update what he says based on his deteriorating optimism.

Fantastic job.

A nice visual novel! I play them from time to time, and this is a good example of a short, well executed little story. The slowly more depressing days, and the almost supernatural happenings of things going more and more wrong, until the last day where literally everything possible goes wrong. I liked that you followed up on the line where you described what a long journey walking would be, that sort of minor payoff is really nice.

The dialogue is over the top in it’s eloquence, which to me gave the game’s world a bit of absurdity which I enjoyed, but others might find jarring and distracting. Also right clicking reset the scene for me, which was a little frustrating!

It has a lot of writing for such a short period, I’m impressed, although I admit I’m a little unsatisfied being left with so many questions! Great job :)

I've never played visual novels before, but this one was very nice. I loved the gradual degradation of the human element in Charlie's life and his arc; taking everything for granted in a high, mighty and sometimes condescending manner before everything crumbles away and they realise how alone they truly are (every life counts i.e. you can't always rely solely on yourself, you need other people in your life for more than just work). The gay barista subplot was a lovely and wholesome way to plant this seed into the narrative.

I will say the writing, while structured and paced very well is also quite overwrought in execution; it thankfully gets more restrained as the plot develops and desperate frustration sets in for our main character but for the most part, almost everyone talks and behaves like they're in a flowery melodrama when the mundane setting and dilemmas eating away at the main character need something more grounded and bitter to more convincingly sell the downward spiral that the story's trajectory takes. I get that Charlie apparently reads a lot of Shakespeare (and Hunger Games too it seems), but it feels kinda ridiculous when he and the barista are both making such eloquently long-winded observations about friggin coffee lol (some interior monologues towards the start become unintentionally hilarious because of this)

This is not to demotivate you or anything; this kind of writing would be superlative for something like a period romance, imo it's also important to consider what mode of dialogue writing would work best for the story at hand. Keep at it! :)

I started off really enjoying it. It is well put together and I liked the art style. I think the silence is the problem, as much as I enjoyed the writing I found my take it all in and respect it soon turned to click as fast as you can and get through it. In part I have limited time to play and rate and I would like to get to see them all if possible so in non jam times maybe that would not be a problem. I got to the end and liked the ending. It's just too quiet to keep me in the world and the only noise that accompanied it was the frantic clicking of my mouse. I thought the story and writing was excellent and was only too long in the context of the jam. The heart that was put into it was evident and I mostly enjoyed my time waiting for the bus.

I can see that you’re really good at narrative, since the story looks pretty promising. But, I’m sorry to say, the gameplay is actually.. well, I don’t know how to say it nicely: it’s boring. I’ve went to Tuesday and then I decided to drop off, since there was actually nothing I could do apart from progressing the dialogue: no choice, no exploration, no clues, no anything… It seems promising as an audio-book, or a short video, but as a game… I don’t know. You can surely put your narrative skills to better use if you team up with someone else next time, in my humble opinion. But hats off for trying to do all by yourself!

EDIT: I’ve felt that my judgment wasn’t fair enough, judging without even finishing your game. I’ve played it again and completed it, and I can confirm to you that this is a nice incipit for a heavy narrative-based game, but you need to work a bit on giving the player some choices.

Cheers!