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Yaaaas

A game in which you must solve a mystery without possessing any applicable skills to do so
Are YOU a bad enough dude to choke out the dog from Monopoly?
Can YOU get arrested for murder before anyone else does?
You are a criminal bear with two stats: CRIMINAL and BEAR.
You're a bunch of raccoons trying to drive a car.
If you're quick enough, you can eat all the canapes before anyone notices you're a farm animal.
Die alone in some godforsaken forest.
You're on a big adventure, but your head keeps falling off.
Quick, create a distraction!
You're an incompetent scout trapped in ancient and hungry woods.